That's fair if you have the same stance for all social interactions. If you don't then it's odd since nothing about programming makes people less human and less impacted by the usual social considerations. Although even if that is your stance for everything it's likely not the stance of everyone on the team.
I've seen people hurt by 1-4 versions though - it's not clear for a lot of people (especially non-native speakers) that those questions coming from Americans actually represent a veiled command shrouded in faux politeness.
I've seen junior devs from other countries get into trouble because they ignored these kind of "questions" since they actually thought they were optional questions and not expectations by other developers.
I put a clear line between social and work interactions.
And from my experience just being direct (not intentionally rude of course!) in work environment pays off dramatically versus wasting time trying not to hurt someone’s feelings.
