Well, I think my optimum is just a hypothetical high-trust society in which everyone strives to be self-sufficient but gets supported in case of failure by others. Of course, this is not how the world works, which is more what you are describing. I don't think that is best though, from the perspective of humanity.
> high-trust society in which everyone strives to be self-sufficient but gets supported in case of failure by others.
But that IS how the world works! Or at least how parts of it have worked and still work. Puritan settlements in the Americas, Mormon communities today, arguably the Nordic countries, other closely knit peoples and communities throughout history... It's just that that comes from favoring the ingroup, not the outgroup.
I think when you remove ingroup and outgroup and just keep the argument for the attitude toward yourself/others it becomes more obvious what I mean. Otherwise it really depends on where you draw the boundary for the ingroup (e.g. your close family)/outgroup (e.g. your neighbors) which leaves a lot of room for interpretation.
I guess my view is that it's easier (and has fewer negative side effects) to get people to care about others by expanding their ingroup than by making them care about their outgroup.